Wednesday, May 4, 2011

unsound minds at play

tell me that ive lost my mind
hush little baby dont you cry
because when it comes down to the point
when were at the end of our wire
we will raise our voice in joy as they set the fires
and burn us to the ground

and what cant be found
is left in translation
what weve left behind
cant be changed with any amount of erasing
youll never hide the stains
and you cant escape the rain
its carressing the dead skin on my back
and peeling off my face
thank god that you arent around
to witness my fallfrom grace

summer air, leave me pale
out of breath and unafraid
leave me to my devices
tied to the speeding train
i cant be slain
no matter how bad it seems it never ends
i just get back up and start again

if you need a place for shelter
turn and look the other way
because im to lost and broken
to even know your name
much less my own
were tossed and thrown
into the pit of flames

ive got so much to do and so little time
every moment precious
can you chime in on the next line,
and wrap me up
before i ramble on again
like a distressed forgotten refrain
the only thing ive left to ask is this
do you feel the same
and can you find it in your heart to ever love me again
im not well anymore, not speaking to myself
can you tell me whats my name its lost again

Thursday, April 21, 2011

hell hath no fury

in the bitter cold
world that we call home
there is nothing left
to scavenge nothing left but emptyness to find
the big wide world is waiting
so how will you greet it when you leave
just another overprepared know nothing
or a budding freak

are we a joke
was i mistaken to believe
that you were something
i could achieve
so i guess its time to move on like before
because its over once more
before anything had begun

and under the harsh sun
out in the heat
i will melt for you
when my heart is done defrosting
i froze my blood and dove into the sea
so i would be out of my misery

youll never see me smile again
ill never crack this icy peak
to which i adhere my skin
and wait patiently
for new ships to sink

hear my siren call i pray you come looking
hell hath no fury lke that of me
and to think
i once was so full of sympathy
so hear my siren call i pray that you come looking

darling, i dont love you anymore

the truth is im not okay
but i strive really hard for it to be that way
and i cant take
another failure in your wake
its not fair to be left holding in the air
when all i want now is to deflate

could you be someone to love
there was a time i thought
you might be sent from above
but now i see your the devil in disguise
and i could have been your prize
but you gave me up as so many before
and now im sitting here
wondering what for

even the bad ones go away
the ones you were never searching for
the ones that just seemed to go your way
and isnt it great
how some things never change

you could at least pretend that your glad to see me
deep down in your heart of darkness theres something worth saving
or so i believed
and yet you look at me
with disgust in your eyes and i cant help but wonder
will i always wonder why
your just the latest catastrophy that i had to survive
whats it for
all i can say is that i dont hate
but darling i dont love you anymore

Saturday, April 2, 2011

say this in closing


the lights are flickering
soon therell be none at all
once again its time to grow up
once again its time for you to move on

pick up your things and walk out into the world
to find where we belong
or to keep on moving on
with no direction

so now your off to see what you can find
you waited 17 years to figure out if it was all a waste of your time
who knows what your future holds
its all up in the air,

will you be who you wanted to be
or will you settle for the path your parents took
will you rise above or will you slip into the nook
and fade in with the walls
for one moment you can feel alright
feel dignified , feel triumphant when your name is called

but who can say what will happen next
your education failed you,
now wait in line for your unemployment checks
the acceptance letter got lost in the mail
now your content with wasting your life just chasing your tail

you keep convincing yourself that its not worth giving up
just wait it out and hopefully your time will come
living life just to be the teachers pet
all that learning, and all your left with is regret

your lifes half over and your such a fool
you could have lived but your too busy being the talk of the stenopool
this in closing is the last chance we'll have to feel alright
from here on out everyday is gonna be a fight

for some its a struggle everyday just to live
and for the rest its getting over the despicable things that you did
to secure your place under the boss grace
misguided ambitionary was it worht it to win the race
and did you find
that the prize was on the other side?

this in closing
is a statement to reinforce
the morals and false truths that we promise to uphold
just to forget them when things get tough
when you make it to the top will it ever be enough
to satisfy your blood lust,

the dark side of ambition
is that its an irreversable condition
and all the guilt and all the shame
cannot bring back the friendships you have slain
you took the path most traveled , and arent your role models proud
just another carbon copy that the system churned out

for the few , left of you who avoid this fate
keep your chins up while their spitting in your face
your may not eat for three weeks at a time
but know that its not a mirage your seeking behind your finish line

for those of us , who learned nothing in school
for those who the system failed who broke all the right rules
for those who scraped by and who nearly failed
you are the ones who will suffer but will blaze the trail

so fake your smiles for the cameras now
take your diplomas and take a bow
grow up and brace yourself
because the time for procrastination
and preparation has run out
take a deep breath bite your lip because the future is now

raise a glass, and heres to hoping
this in closing

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

carcinogen lullaby

for what its worth to you
have a good time while you can
do what you want to do
while your still livin with mom and dad

well ill do what i want and buy what i please
cause now i can do anything finally free finally 18
andwe were already drinking long before we learned how to drive

but today you woke up from the day dream
just to find
your paychecks on delay
but all the bills arrived on time

now all the money is gonna pay the overdraft fees
there'll  be nothing left for groceries
how oh how will you survive

its time again to hit the streets
to find a way to make ends meet and pay the rent
you better hurry up and get famous kid

how will you survive?

- i cant think of a better reason to get loaded
your depressed and your anxious,
filling through the bank statements
coming up short again
i couldnt make up a better reason to be loaded
the best that you can do to cope
is to smoke until your chokin
and your lungs are givin in

all the frustration
calls for a mild sedation
just to handle the nerves so you
can get through
need to slip under the grip
of a nicotene dream
so for a moment you can breathe
i couldnt think of a better reason to get loaded

" this is my carcinogen lullaby
i need to die a little
just so i can feel alright
so i can try to get through the night -

the house is trashed
your gonna have to pay for that
with the money you dont have

can you see a pattern forming

some get it all but the ones like us will never have nothing
could you find a better reason to get loaded
-
by yourself  your not coping
in one week we'll be on the streets
you need help , therapys expensive
but cigarettes are cheap
needing a break from reality
gonna slip into the safety
of a nicotene dream its so comforting"

this is my carcinogen lullaby
you know its not a popular answer
but we might not even live to see cancer
anyway all we know is that today is too much
you need a crutch to hold you
when your pressed up against a wall
something to cushion the fall

carcinogen lullaby , make me feel allright
fix me up and take me out
help me from feeling let down

.. and at the party
your pissed cause your the one whos driving
got to hide the embarassing truth that your starving
but let them have their fun
who needs to know that your dying

a little everyday

got suspended from work indefinitely
 , how will you survive?
the moneys all run out , and time is ticking
now your slipping

how will you survive
your just a small fish in a large ocean

could you find a better reason to get loaded

" this is my carcinogen lullaby
 yeah i need a little help to get through the night
my head is going numb i just want to feel alright
how will we survive
this is my carcinogen lullaby
its not a socially respected answer
but i doubt ill even live to see cancer
so might as well  does anyone have a light?

pressed up against a wall
need a crutch to hold me up
and cushion my fall
can you make me feel alright?"

life isnt always what it seems
some seem to get it all meanwhile your getting nothing
just bad news and rejection apologies
no way to settle the score
self medicating
is just so  comforting

live it out but the stress is fracturing
we all need help cant find ourselves
we need to get lost for a while its time for discombobulating
to distract us from the pain

sing yourself to sleep
say goodnight and close your eyes
if only for five minutes of time
this is my carcinogen lullaby
its bittersweet but its what i need to keep me alive
you know we've got to live fast because tomorrow we may well die
does anyone have a light ?

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

the dark side of ambition

so dr. jekyl tell me about your situation
is it true what theyre saying about you
or is it just speculation
i think we should shed a little light on the subject
take out our magnifying glass, anylize the subtext

well if your one to complain
its only evidence to your shame
your gonna have to try a little harder
to substantiate your claims

no no no

it never happened this way
i never touched the blame
i have nothing for which to be ashamed
i am not the one you seek
so quit pointing your fingers at me

......

laying down on the concrete
with the evidence in hand
a puddle of blood
makes it a self defense
youve got no control
everyone take your pitty to him
spare the man let the monster inside be condemned

.......

so jack the ripper
remember to fasten your zipper
been prowling the streets too long
i know that somethings going on

well your always avoiding
trying to keep in the shadows out of sight
well isnt it time to let the truth come to light

.......
 well youve got nothing left to gain
better wallow in your pain
its a crime of passion you see
theres no sin on me

play out your sympathy
to fool the judge and your jury
you might have them fooled
but your not playing by the rules

explain your sorrow to them
they might believe
but i know what it is your hiding
..........

the lies that you carry out
concealed behind the doubt
isnt it time you let your secrets out
dont keep them bottled up inside
the more you try to hide
the more you get caught up in your lies

oh dear count of mine
why is your mouth red all the time
well tell me honestly
got a habbit for good storys
but fictions not what im after
dont need a happily ever after
just need the truth at any cost


well if your one to complain
its only evidence to your shame
your gonna have to try a little harder
to substantiate your claims

the more you stay around the scene
the more i seem to notice when you linger
the more you proffess your innocence
the more you point the finger
 at your at your self
well your lying doesnt help

........
 im not the one to blame
ive got nothing to be ashamed
and if you need the proof right now your gonna have to wait
my alibys being staged

and the more you say

it never happened this way
i the one to blame
i have nothing for which to be ashamed
i am not the one you seek
so quit pointing your fingers at me

Friday, February 25, 2011

have your cake and choke on it too

just another nail in the coffin
you break your vows
and change hands often
your one who trys to preach
but youve got no soul that you can reach

ive got a reason
for this that im feelin
its a fed up hatred
and hating to be used

" your just a pointless mission
never know what you are missing
cause your never in one place for a long time
your gonna get caught one day in your lies
and noones gonna be on your side

what will you do , when im not there for you
because god knows you wouldnt be there for me
so why is it that im supposed to be a bad friend
when i cant service your every whim
but your not to blame when i need something "

you can never take the truth
because its to harsh to hear
you get so wrapped up in your selfishness
that you'll say anything and try to make it sincere
if it gets you what you came for , then therse no problems here

get me a drink
so that i can think
clearly when im talking to you
ive got to be out of my mind
to understand the stupid things that you do

so tell me what is your problem now
how will the mellodrama play out

is this a new episode
feels like a re run
because its always the same thing you know
tell the same sob story
it wont work on me cause im done

" your just a pointless mission
never know what you are missing
cause your never in one place for a long time
your gonna get caught one day in your lies
and noones gonna be on your side

what will you do , when im not there for you
because god knows you wouldnt be there for me
so why is it that im supposed to be a bad friend
when i cant service your every whim
but your not to blame when i need something "

just another nail in the coffin
you tell lies so often
that its astounding you remember your name
well theres only one question i have
why did you bother , why have you came

just another nail in the coffin
youve got no reasons to be here
well tell me my dear
when are you going to quit
and how is it that i could forget

im done with everything
im going to sit back and watch you hang
because to me now you dont mean a thing

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Theology

tie my hands, so i wont break any bones
lock me down , so i dont lose control
talk me down , cause theres no way out of this
not that i see, all i see is emptyness

Silver tongued
and piercing gaze
breaking down my wall
indiscriminate hate

" your eyes like the pit of my soul
your wind lifting up my hollow bones
take flight my soul
and leave the rest lost and faded
fill me with a hope that cant be tainted

fill me with your night
take it away so contrast makes me bright
whisper to me and bring me to life"

hold my skin to this flesh
so it wont slip away
drown out my sorrow ,
so it cannot stain

pull me in
then wash me down
swallow me whole
then spit me out

leave my body breathless
broken in the ground
cover me in earth
as your lower it down
remember me perfect
so you'll have no reasons to forget


" your eyes like the pit of my soul
your wind lifting up my hollow bones
take flight my soul
and leave the rest lost and faded
fill me with a hope that cant be tainted

fill me with your night
take it away so contrast makes me bright
whisper to me and bring me to life"

i dont believe in gods
but i believe its true
something in all of us
exists to bring something else through

were never gonna find it
if we try to look
something this great
you cant define in a book

so they call me a sinner
they'd wish to excommunicate
if only they could
if only i came

they'll call me a heathen
brand me insane
doing the world a favor
putting hot lead in my brain

if it makes you feel better
because my eyes are open
and ill never see the same

" your eyes like the pit of my soul
your wind lifting up my hollow bones
take flight my soul
and leave the rest lost and faded
fill me with a hope that cant be tainted

fill me with your night
take it away so contrast makes me bright
whisper to me and bring me to life"

so fill me with your light
and give me the strength
all i see is good,
unlike those who are tamed
by the fear, of what
they refuse to understand
they never would , doesnt matter if they can

i found faith, in a lack of belief
i found that god brings noone relief
this is so much older
its something i can touch
if you dont want to hear it
well then cling to your crutch

my eyes are open
and finally i see
the things that held me back
were the laws that i believed
so i found balance in something i can feel
it isnt whats popular
but its something that is real

i hope they burry me deep beneat the soil
i hope they think , that they can damn my soul
well heres to hopin'
and heres to us "lost souls"
cause my eyes are open
and they'll never make them close

Friday, February 18, 2011

mission statments of the defiant

reconcile your imperfection
so you can mollify your pain
focus on your own addictions
and alleviate the strain

its all about convictions
and can you sanctify your name
get up off your high perch
and learn to fly again

" dont turn the lights out
cause im not going home
give me a place to stand
and i will move the earth
a heart is just a broken thing
that i dont have and dont deserve
so dont pick me up let me learn this on my own
but dont turn the lights out cause im not goin home"

preach your words into my ears
sedate my disbelief and disavow my fear
that maybe im not good enough
pierce the veil around my soul its tough
but you can take away my tears
and though my edges are rough
dont give up when i can almost hear

" dont turn the lights out
cause im not going home
wont give it up now
i can make it on my own
its not that i dont need help
im just to dependant on myself
to know when its okay
to let someone else bare the strain
and i dont want to feel like ive left you in the rain
if i take your helping hand and escape
so dont give up your almost through
your message is painful but its true
and i dont know what to do
if i cant do iton my own
so dont turn the lights out
cause i cant stand to be alone"

the stars are falling once again
and i can catch them in my filth hands
will you dance
teach me the steps
and we will turn back the clock
if only for a minute

give me a chance
to show you my world
and just observe
the changes i have made
to survive all the hardship thrown at me
would you think me weak
or would you applaud me

would you tell me i did good
or would you cut me out again
can you hear
are you listening
am i talking to myself
somethings even to you i cant explain

there are these things
that make it difficult
im not forgetting
but i would forgive you anything
im not upset its just no shock to me
that when everything falls down
i turn around ,
and once again
your nowhere to be found

" dont turn the lights out
cause i dont want to go home
im not ready to call it quits
even as the curtain closes
im quite used to being alone
i think i can make it on my own
leave me anywhere you want
but you cant take me home
becuase theres nowhere i can go
and call it home

give me a moment and break me
and i will repair the tear
hold my heart to your heart and swear
that you will be there
dont turn the lights out
its not over theres more to be shown
dont turn the lights out
cause im not ready to go home"



Sunday, February 13, 2011

Corporate sacrifice

the sun never sets on the british empire
the evil planet smiles
all of the plans that were set into motion
have born the fruit of cruel desires

chaining the inferior and te different
while silencing the rebel cries
called to arms we have found a demon
to which we can pin our lies

we gave a cause for the social schism
we persecute and we call it right
no one will question our good intentions
they hold the guns but we set their sights

profits are turned when the worlds in opposition
the more we make from the more who die
why should we care for the innocent
when we mint gold from their blood and their lives

" its all about placing blame
more havoc induced is more money to claim
noone will question the situation we have made
moral heros sharpen your blades

massacre the children in the night
we sit behind our false idols
at the base of golden walls we hide
hoist your banner your the face of progress
encourage killing cause it makes your stocks rise"

the sun never sets
the sun never dies
the sun never sets
forget your sympathy and fall in line

" its all about placing blame
more havoc induced is more money to claim
no one will question the situation we have made
moral heros sharpen your blades

massacre the children in the night
so they dont grow up and learn to fight
we sit behind our false idols
at the base of golden walls we hide
your the face of false progress
so carry your banner high
encourage killing cause it makes your stocks rise"

fires will burn the village down
destroy the huts and tents and build a town
clear out the locals its the kings land now

educate the heathens and call them civilized
we conquered the new world forget the ones who were here first
the whole maps colonized
raise the flag , theyll never get it back
no matter how hard they try

" its all about placing blame
more havoc induced is more money to claim
no one will question the situation we have made
moral heros sharpen your blades

massacre the children in the night
so they dont grow up and learn to fight
we sit behind our false idols
at the base of golden walls we hide
your the face of false progress
so carry your banner high
encourage killing cause it makes your stocks rise"

the sun never sets
the sun never dies
forget your regrets, fall in line
hail to the new world order
her holy empire never will she die
burn all the pages in history
that claim what we did wasnt right
its just another corporate sacrifice



Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Show and tell , SHot in 9 millimeter

 twitching eyes glance down the barrel
of a loaded god complex with a lasting cap heart
and now were all in peril ,
as he threatens to tear himself apart
his veins are full of gasoline
hes got c4 in his liver and his spleen
we should have seen this coming

hearts collide at the speed of sound
the lights go up and we paint the town
a whole new kind of red
and how could they forget
hes gonna make them listen
and he has spoken
with no words but it left you broken

could you believe
what your seeing with your eyes
as the fire grows and the fumes black out the sky
can you blame him
for something he felt was the only way out
he kissed the gun, with a bullet in the spout
and now hes spoken , now hes spoken
and it cannot be undone

 bullets fly at the speed of sound
he closed his eyes and branded this town
a killer with a heart of stone
painted the town , a whole new shade of red
and you can not forget, what hes said
now hes spoken , now hes spoken

look to the mirror if your searching for the reason
everyone who never had the time
and as the muzzle flash glistened
he found a way to make them listen
isnt it a perfect commentary
on the kind of world we live in

he searched his whole damn life
for a way to end his strife
and he traded in his knife
for something a little more theatrical
and powerful
he was always hard to handle
but noone seemed to care why
so he gave destruction a try

and as your guilt is settling
and you ask yourself why he did it
how can you blame him
he tried so hard for your attention
well he finally found a way to make you listen

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Relat-(ion)-sinking-ships

"the past is the past
or so they say
but i cant help bringing it up
in these social outings
and my oh my, isnt it astounding
how people never change
your still the same
and hes the lucky one
so why do you keep
dialing my number all the time
just to feed me the same old tired lines"

i cut my hair and dyed my bangs
change my earrings and my name
and somehow i still fall for your type
and after everyone of them is gone
i still see your face
oh isnt he the lucky one
but does he know the secrets your hiding
and how you just cant
keep my name out of your mouth
maybe its time you figure this out

" the past is the past
or so they say
but i just cant help
brining it up in these social outings
and my oh my isnt it astounding
how people never change
your still the same
isnt he the lucky one
so why do you keep dialing
my number all the time
just to feed me
the same old tired lines"

i gave you my time for free
and kept your sullied memory
you didnt want to keep me
good to know im only worth fucking
and they wonder why im low on self esteem

"the past is the past or so they say
but i cant help bringing it up
in these social outings
and my oh my isnt it astounding
how people never change
your still the same
and hes the lucky one
so why do you keep dialing
my number all the time
just to feed me
the same tired lines"

arent these the places
and the faces
we still treasure mutually
you seem distressed
but your the one thats haunting me
and lately ive been thinking

"the past is the past or so they say
but i just cant help bringing it up
in these social outings
and my oh my isnt it astounding
how people never change
your still the same
and hes the lucky one
so why do you keep dialing
my number all the time
just to give me
the same tired lines"

well maybe im too good for you
but why are we both still longing
your friends could never mean anything
but yet you choose pretty faces and accuainting
over love and extacy

"the past is the past or so they say
but i cant help bringing it up
in these social outings
and my oh my isnt it astounding
how people never change
your still the same
and hes the lucky one
so why do you keep dialing
my number all the time
to give me the same tired lines"

well when you get back to your
charades and poker
remember that for a moment you let
your guard recede for me
pardon me for being upset
when i thought that meant something
keep trying to forget
and crawl back to your closet

The past is the past or so they say
but i cant help bringing it up
in these social outings
i express what you try to repress
but why are you so ashamed and why are you hiding
tag your it because im done with counting
if you want me again well good luck finding
love once lost cant be reclaimed
yet i still fall for your type
the same pretty faces to whom i am nothing
more than just a fling

Monday, January 31, 2011

Building Dieties


i am the walking deity
a demi god in this wicked society,
if anone should challenge me
they will walk with me
in heaven for all of eternity ,

empty promises reap no rewards,
and hollow point wit is no match for swords,
its a crazy world we live in and were all mad,
so wipe the frown from your face
and quit feeling sad,
we paint this world perfect
and become what we dream ,
because reality is never truely how it seems

watch the colors run as they bleed
through the canvas
the tallest man is no greater than the praying mantis
its all in the perspective and my view is clear
theres no escape once you enter here

the rabbit hole
is swallowing
the last remnants of this so called reality
it detonates the realm in which we live
and brings us back to being primitive

we build then we break
we destroy to grow
if humanity is civilized then you must not know
the terror that we cause on a day to day
we kill our own kind, and masquerade
we break all our rules, and put man before all
we stab each other in the backs and murder all that crawls
the earth is ours to claim, so keep your aim straight
the gods will fall, and olympus waits

" what are you waiting for
isnt this why you were born
to become another cog in the machine
or do your dreams lead you to something more
forge your own destiny
and give purpose to the empty
break apart the chaos and make it perfect
you are the hero of your own epic
time to be a man to settle the score
the future that your waiting for is outthe front door"

take this breath and hold your ground
exhale with hurricane force but make no sound
keep your stance straight and your back erect
reign over everything that the light reflects
suit up and ship out sail away
the spils of war are won and lost based on your fate
theres no escape but dont lose your will
your bound to your calling and bring all of your skill
tonight we dine in hell so have no fear
we go down fighting or we were never here
be remembered and become something great
your destiny is based on what you create

" what are you waiting for
isnt this why you were born
to become another cog in the machine
or do your dreams lead you to something more
forge your own destiny
and give purpose to the empty
break apart the chaos and make it perfect
you are the hero of your own epic
time to be a man to settle the score
the future that your waiting for is outthe front door"

what are you waiting for the futures right here
enough with your doubting give up your fear
feel the sweat as it coats your face
the exits are blocked so make a way
heros never run,
and villains never give up
its now or never, are you good or corupt
the decisions are black and white
so will you run like a child or be a god and fight

" what are you waiting for
isnt this why you were born
to become another cog in the machine
or do your dreams lead you to something more
forge your own destiny
and give purpose to the empty
break apart the chaos and make it perfect
you are the hero of your own epic
time to be a man to settle the score
the future that your waiting for is out the front door"

and now you breath your dying breath
hold it in let it fill your chest
feel the prosperity
and walk into the light
we are the walking deities
and we conquer olympus tonight

Substantiate


 noone can climb the mountaintop ,
 its far too high
the walls we build reach toward the sky,
the sun will be blotted
by the blackness in our soul
and the world will grow
barron and cold,
the lines we draw in sand
are washed away,
the footprints we leave
are encased in clay,
and we will never be forgotten,
for the terrible attrocities we perpotrate,
under the guise of the innocent mistake

broadcasting what we pretend to be ashamed
and crucifying those who arent the same
we are the only ones who cause our pain
what are we living for , and when theres noone left
who is it that you blame

collecting hearts to sacrifice
to our empty void
and give us life
we waste what we get
and feel no regret
because its just so easy
to wash your hands of it
and hide the secrets away

we treat life like a toy
and we fight against each other
and trade old friends for new lovers
giving it all away at the first bid
we poison ourselves
and crash and burn
we cant prepare
because we never learn

collecting hearts to sacrifice
to our empty void
to feel new life
because were all too afraid to die
but not prepared to live
were stuck in between
and cant get over the hill
we climb and we climb,
and we get nowhere
the more we get
the less we care

hold a glass high for the damaged
at least we have character
we will learn to manage
we will never quit and never surrender
the demographic is not ours to claim
and we dont fit in and yet were to blame
so propose a toast for the lost and broken
for those who keep heads high
 with our eyes wide open
normal is defective so forgive me when i decline
this dream that your forcing , is not one of mine

Curtain Call

turn up the lights
let me see you fall
grace the floor
on your knees now crawl

I am the show
and you get what you pay for
you oughta know
youve got to buy your time
bathe me in the spotlight
and follow my decline

nose to the sky
parading like a god
excess on high
the lights are too damn hot
but ive got it all im in my prime
isnt it amazing
yeah and isnt it sublime

i am the show
and you get what you pay for
you oughta know
youve got to buy your time
bathe me in the spotlight
and follow my decline

my heels are aching
my heart is breaking
and the lines are showing
as my make ups flaking
can you take a break
and call an intermission
i need to satidfy my superstitions
isnt it hard to handle
strike the match and burn this candle
and watch it glow
cath me
im a falling star
and it is to be said
that we are who we are

i am the show
im the leading man
you know
i payed my dues
and its my time
bathe me in spotlight
and follow my decline
hold your lines
give me my moment
mad like a hornet
ive got you all under my claws
and in my spell
this is a private hell
and its time to go on
let the drama flow
everyone will know
i am the show

everyone
is just the same
they dont care
they just bare witness to my shame
i earned the fame
but took it too far
yelling pull the curtain
staring at the headlights of an oncomong car
i am the star
and this is my tragic demise
you alone can make me into something
something i despise
and i dont know why
i live like this
its like heroin to me
and i just cant resist

i am the show
im the leading man
dont you know
i did my time
i played all the characters
and worked my way up the line
into the prime
now i sit here on my pedestal
as the empire meets its demise

I am the show
im the leading man
dont you know
payed my dues it is my time
now let me shine
bathe me in the spotlight
take care and follow my decline

the pay is bad the hours are slow
you watched me grow
youll watch me die
snap your fingers and on cue i will cry
look what i built , it glimmers beautifully
who would of thought it would be what destroyed me

I am the show
im the leading man
dont you know
hold the line
bathe me in the spotlight
and follow my decline
the more we hurt the more we grow
the more you live the more you know
never stop and take it slow
everybody knows
im the main attraction
sit back and enjoy the action

I am the show
im the leading man
dont you know
i payed my dues
time after time
bathe me in the spotlight
and watch me as i shine
careful dont lose me
follow me into my decline
we are our only foes
for heaven knows
its gotta end sometime
living life inside the glow
of flashing lights
I am the show

Suicide doors spoil all the fun


interesting to say the least
your a misunderstanding
part of the bigger beast
of politics and bad planning
your just another statistic that broke the mold
but your never gonna get back to the life that you sold
and is it cold out there, out there on your own
take a still frame,fixing up your heart of shame
your a project thats behind the deadline
waiting for a lifeline

press eject
hit the button and get away
run as far as you can
try and escape your disgace
smiling like a vandal
clinging tight to the handle
of your getaway car

youve got the gasoline
while drinking kerosene
swallow your molotov coctail
light the fuse send em all to hell
youve got the drakest soul that ive ever seen
but its alright
your interesting to say the least
just a cog in the gears of the disaster machine
kid your gonna be fine

so drop all of your inspirations
find a new way to infiltrate the system
and send it all computer virus style crashing down
hot the lights cue the explosion sounds
youve got an sadistic way of partying

press eject hit the button and get away
fast as you can, gotta make yourself a better man
your a little rattlesnake with withdrawl shakes
need excitment just to give you a high
well theyre all fake ,
make em pay before they give you a ride
smiling like a vandal
clinging tight to the handle
of your getaway car

ill be your driver
so grab the cash
dead on arrival
show em what you got

we lost our invite to the party
showed up overdressed and tardy
but its allright
and oh boy did the bouncers get quite a show
so grab your guns and here we go
reach it for the sky
wont some preacher come and save my soul
i cant resist the temptation , cause im much too bold

press eject
hit the button and get away
got a tongue like a rattlesnake
but its so convincing
you got me where you want me now
a hot item on the black market
with a run in your stockings
your alright
so come on tonight
lets hit up every easy target that we pass by

press eject hit the button and get away
hide the bullets in the ashtray
hit the gas and run like hell
and even if they catch us
theyre nevver gonna get us to tell
and even if they catch theyll never
ever get us to tell

No such thing as bad press

 in with the wind and out just the same
drifting where my compass takes me
i know nothing of what you say
im not from here and i feel no pain
i cannot wait to get out of this town

take a breath cause your wheezing
take a pill cause your seizing up
and take a sniff of that white stuff
to put a stop to the sneezing
cough up your lungs and fix your makeup
because your face is showing
well mirror mirror are you pretty enough

" the fakest part of you
is that all the glue
wont hold together
your coming undone
and show no emotions
can you even feel any sensation
beneath your mask
taking it off is a task
because im not sure it may be who you are
why are you trying so hard"

i cant stop pretending she says
at the top of her lungs in a crowded room
well did you get what you want
now that the atentions on you
theres no such thing as bad press
thers no such thing , well not when im in this dress

the glasses break as the jaws drop
i cant believe she said it
well if im not so wrong
you'd probably let me forget it
wel thers no such thing, as bad press
she says she says,
and who am i to blame, when you taught me everything

i know this is hard  but the hardest part
is fighting yourself, and facing the truth
theres no such thing, well keep dreaming

" the fakest part of you
is that youl never be
what you keep saying you are
well mirror mirro on the wall
tell me the im pretty too
with six inch heels and a six inch dress
theres no such thing, no such thing
as bad press,
its all like make believe ,
look now im on tv
as the cops pull over my car
thers no such thing, as bad press
no business like show business
why are you trying so hard"

the paparazzi is , i kid in glasses
trying to sneak a peak through her window
in the candle glow
he saw things that hustler is too classy to show
she doesnt care, and without underwear
she strikes her most provocative pose
in six inch heels and a six inch dress
she says theres no such thing as bad press

the gentlemans club
probably spit you up
remember that youve got to charge
before you go too far
you give up everything for free
well pay attention next time
and remember the lights are in your mind

theres no such thing if you know what i mean
no such thing well theres no such thing

" so strike a pose
and put on some clothes
noone cares to buy what your selling
are we to late for the show
with the candle glow
you reveal everything
keep in mind
that when you sell your time
it helps to collect first and tell what your charging
she says in six inch heels and a six inch dress
well thers no such thing as bad press"

Judas

set the fires , let it all go up
smok will choke all of the corrupt
who still stand in the way
what is it there all trying to save
fighting for a piece of currency

" what has all of this money done for you
and what is the silver worth
would you kill for a dollar bill
and for a piece of eight who would you betray
judas? how have you come to this
judas? i guess we were never friends
judas? can you can you hear the bells
judas? your greed has bought you hell"

crucify the innocents
nail yourself to the cross of gold
trade your life for anything that shines
never know what the future holds
give away all that you cared for
to buy yourself a clue
well for what glimmers in the right light,
you gave up your soul ,
was it worth it all to you
and did you regret it after it was sold
seal the deal with ink and blood
and know that you can not undo
what devils have you sold out to?

" judas coming down the mountain
judas the walking troll
judas your tainted and lonely
judas you gave up your soul
judas gave up all that was holy
for the silver that turned you cold"

walk this world forever with the silver in your hand
and try to figure out and understand
each day you carry your own cross
and all the money will not do
your greed is insatiable, and you cant quench your thirst
with lust and guilty hearts, you forever crawl the earth
judas coming down the mountain
after saking hands
the devil waits in silence
watching you fulfill his plans
pilot will wash his hands, and yet the blood will stain
and judas for ten pieces of silver, yu bought eternal pain

" what did all that money get you
how much is silver really worth
would you kill for a dollar bill
and forever walk the earth
for a piece of eight who would you betray
judas? do you hold anything dear
judas? does your guilt still keep you here
judas? can you hide your sullen face
judas? sold something you could not replace
judas? i dont know why you did this
judas? betrayed us all with a kiss
judas? can you here the bells
judas? for ten pieces of silver, you bought yourself hell"

Russian Roulette


sit down , at the table
playing god, with a hnd thats unable
to get you to the next round
but its not too late for you to pull out now
i play for keeps, no time for surprises
i got the cards up my sleeves, and get all the prizes
if you think you got  what it takes
well baby sit down , and lets play

" let it all go
say it aint so
your lying to me i know
but bless your heart you mean well
and i can tell
your smile is fading
your eyes are glazing
your afflicted just the same
you shouldnt have tried to play my games"

Its all unwinable
why do you  contnue to try
the die is cast, decisions are made
well thats how you play do you like this game
freezing me in
a deceptive stare
i know what your hiding
keep your hand there
throw another bet baby if you dare

keep your eyes locked
dont be misunderstood
your money is mine
wouldnt let you take it back  if you could
" let it all go
say it aint so
your lying to me i know
but bless your heart you mean well
and i can tell
your smile is fading
your eyes are glazing
your afflicted just the same
you shouldnt have tried to play my games"

you dont always have to be strong
you keep on your own you wont last long
your gonna burn down in flames
your gonna die in vain
and when they lay you to rest wouldnt it be a shame
if they didnt remember your name
well never try to play my games
well you shouldnt well you shouldnt
i knew you couldnt , take it
well i knew you couldnt, take this

" let it all go
say it aint so
your lying to me i know
but bless your heart you mean well
and i can tell
your smile is fading
your eyes are glazing
your afflicted just the same
you shouldnt have tried to play my games"

lay down your weapons, give up the fight
you dont alwys have to be so damn right
accept the fact, everyones wrong sometimes
give in give up , and get out alive
this is a game youll never win
learn how to fold, never call all in
i told you i meant it, i wasnt bluffing
well now your in for it , cause ive got something
under my skin
under the table , with my ace in the hole,
i begged and pleaded , but you still wouldnt fold

your too head strong for you own good
well maybe you misunderstood
im not as easy to figure out,
im not that easy now
maybe your sorry, but its far to late
i told you not to try to play my games

" let it all go
say it aint so
your lying to me i know
but bless your heart you mean well
and i can tell
your smile is fading
your eyes are glazing
your afflicted just the same
you shouldnt have tried to play my games"

turn up the bottle , take a hit to the head
and drown out the silence
russian roulette
turn up that botle , take the hit to the head
drown out the silence
russian ...russian

well maybe you thought wrong ,
it happens all the time
well maybe you need to give up
just say goodbye
walk away and keep your life

i play for keeps didnt i tell you
i take what i please, didnt i tell you
im not one thats so easy to beat
ill hustle you down can you taste the defeat
im hard to crack , you wont quite get away
wont see me on my back , theres no way
if your so dead set on it, well then lets play
you think you can win , well let the games begin

" let it all go
say it aint so
your lying to me i know
but bless your heart you mean well
and i can tell
your smile is fading
your eyes are glazing
your afflicted just the same
you shouldnt have tried to play my games"

so you think so you think you can handle it
but baby baby dont forget
im not that easy , and your gonna regret
playing russian  roulette

Expandable

 i guess it doesnt matter what you do
its all gonna fire back at you
and all the roads lead to nowhere
and your stuck in the middle
looking for a way out
but whos going to save us now

" Our heroes have fallen
and were all on our own
our role models are hypocrits
and theres nothing that we know
that will protect us from what is to come
when were out there in the big wide world
and theres nowhere to run
who can save us all now
Who can help us figure all of this out
were all lost and blown
if theres a path out of here , it has to be shown
because were never gonna find it,
 never gonna get out , on our own"

i never thought much of anything
was ever going to change
but i was wrong
it can get worse , from what ive seen
and its so lonely
to be the only one who understands
where im coming from, and where i stand
they say they listen but they wont let you talk
just nod your head, and accept what theyve said
but thats the problem all along
and thats why im feeling like its time to go
i cant run away from this , i have to stick it out

there comes a time
when its just too late
to cut all your loses
and just walk away
the way is shut and what can you do
where can you turn
when the only way out is through
tell us how to grow and thrive
tell us these things
that will help us survive
manners and punctuation
never helped anyone
to put food on the table
in times that were primitive
the strong survive and the weak blow away
well we are helpless , as of today
you sacrificed us with goodbye
just cut the strings, from which we were tied
so thightly, s close to mommy dear
we never learned how,
to get back from here

" Our heroes have fallen
and were all on our own
our role models are hypocrits
and theres nothing that we know
that will protect us from what is to come
when were out there in the big wide world
and theres nowhere to run
who can save us all now
Who can help us figure all of this out
were all lost and blown
if theres a path out of here , it has to be shown
because were never gonna find it,
 never gonna get out , on our own"

yes when your out in the cold
what do you do , to warm your bones
and when your drowning in two feet of rain
how do you float , when you just dont know
what are you going to do
when the only way out is through
and your lifeline have been scattered to the wind
i think we might make it
if only we knew how to begin

" Our heroes have fallen
and were all on our own
our role models are hypocrits
and theres nothing that we know
that will protect us from what is to come
when were out there in the big wide world
and theres nowhere to run
who can save us all now
Who can help us figure all of this out
were all lost and blown
if theres a path out of here , it has to be shown
because were never gonna find it,
 never gonna get out , on our own"

The beautiful crash and the art of drowning

 im not breathing anymore
the waters filling my lungs
and i start to struggle
and what has it been for
im not going to win, might as well just die right here
make ll of the pain just disappear
will they remember, will they want to remember
me

" its not to late
to make it out alive
just push on through
maybe im gonna survive
well you dont really believe that do you
truth is i dont know what i believe anymore
close my eyes for me if i dont live through it
then close yours mind and try to forget
the horible things i did"

i spent all this time
being apathetic
and honestly
im the most pathetic
of all the poor bastards that i know

its good to understand
that i learned this now
who could possibly forget how
all the terrible shades that ive shown
they dimmed , and faded when i was so wasted
on the poisonous thoughts that invaded
my mind and made it corrode

i didnt care, i was unaware
how everything i did
i did wrong
it seemed so dark , at the end of my tunnel
if there was a path out id never find the way

" its not to late
to make it out alive
just push on through
maybe im gonna survive
well you dont really believe that do you
truth is i dont know what i believe anymore
close my eyes for me if i dont live through it
then close yours mind and try to forget
the horible things i did"

under the water, i think to myself
as im running out of breath
i hope someone will save me
cause i dont want to die  looking like this
i hadnt planned i would sink so low
i never thought i was as weak as i was
when i took that swim
i just dove in to the water that was over my head
help help help me , bubbles trap the words i cant release

" its not to late
to make it out alive
just push on through
maybe im gonna survive
well you dont really believe that do you
truth is i dont know what i believe anymore
close my eyes for me if i dont live through it
then close yours mind and try to forget
the horible things i did"

and though i was pulled out
the water still covers me
and i do not think i have much left to believe
i cant clutch my sides
i cant find relief
all i can do i crumple over and vomit
while the still walls make me dizzy

"its not to late
to make it out alive
just push on through
maybe im gonna survive
well you dont really believe that do you
truth is i dont know what i believe anymore
close my eyes for me if i dont live through it
then close yours mind and try to forget
the horible things i did"

Swallow


open up your mouth
come on wider now
is that all youve got
give it another shot

say ahhhhh
hold it there
while theres still air to spare
now clench your teeth together
upon your lead tongue and your diamond inscisors
disfigure your wretched mouth, to keep you silent forever

" swalllow, whole
feed your tainted soul
with the venom from your lungs
and pieces of your tongue
and swallow swallow it all
your fake personality
and all of the things
that make you so empty
your lies are getting hard to follow
well now i guess the truth is hard to swallow "

dont even bother trying to spit it all out
ill just cram it back into your mouth
and down your down your throat
just shut up and swallow

the truth that you wont touch
and tell me is it too much
can you can you swallow this
if not then why is it
that you spit it all back at me
if you cant swallow swallow it
then get used to being lonely

" swalllow, whole
feed your tainted soul
with the venom from your lungs
and pieces of your tongue
and swallow swallow it all
your fake personality
and all of the things
that make you so empty
your lies are getting hard to follow
well now i guess the truth is hard to swallow "

oh hush now dear
cause i dont want to hear
and if you start to choke
then hold on to hope
dont even bother trying to spit this out
your never gonna get around
the truth thats staring you in the face
swallow your pride and bite your pain
if you cant swallow this
then tell me how can you spit it
back at back at me
you know what i think you need ?

you need to

" swalllow, whole
feed your tainted soul
with the venom from your lungs
and pieces of your tongue
and swallow swallow it all
your fake personality
and all of the things
that make you so empty
your lies are getting hard to follow
well now i guess the truth is hard to swallow "

swallow swallow whole
all these pieces of your bile and tainted soul
the truth is staring back at you
well think what you say next time
it may be the next thing youve got to swallow

can you breath and can you cope
and baby wait till you start to choke
on the truth your gonna have to swallow
i hope your brought a second stomach for this
cause you cant leave until you finish finish it
if you dont shut your shut your mouth
youll have to swallow, all the shit you that you spit out
your secrets secrets out, , so whats left to talk about

" swalllow, whole
feed your tainted soul
with the venom from your lungs
and pieces of your tongue
and swallow swallow it all
your fake personality
and all of the things
that make you so empty
your lies are getting hard to follow
well now i guess the truth is hard to swallow "

bash your teeth and spit them out
it wont help you help you now
youve got to swallow
all your foolish pride
and the secrets that you had
you never had a prolem letting everybody know
but know your own lies, your gonna have to swallow

Wasteland part2

well the castle fell
right before the people broke
a new day is rising, as the city dies in smoke
take me with you when you pass on through
so i can say i wish you were here, the jokes on you
our souls can be saved
from this wasteland ,
but youve got to escape
from this wasteland
oh they all will pay
in this wasteland
no mans land , of jealousy and hate
Wasteland
it was all in vain

the flag was raised again
as they took their city back
the years passed on by
and they won their freedom back
from all the ashes and soot
they stitched up the flag ,
and cut off the queens foot
they framed it to the wall so they would never forget
how they traded a good thing , for a terror dressed in black
next time they wont be so lucky they may not win it back
they try to be ready for the next attack
of the wasteland , but for now democracy shall stand
let freedom reign over the wasteland,
no mans land to be claimed

Wasteland part 1

 the day broke and the people choked
on the ashes and the carnage and the pillows of smoke
they barely believed with their hypnotic eyes
they awoke with terror to a world they despised
and as the people shouted death to the beast
a war song was playing to the tune of hail to the cheif
it was the day they traded their honesty
they overthrew the people and crowned a new queen
with an iron fist, she became the seven headed beast
they raised up a monster who had won by defeat

"in this wasteland, this no mans land
its a barron world, its a scarred up earth
in this wasteland , give your freedom at the door
you can pay the dues , or be struck to the floor
its a no mans land, ruled by a crown of thorns
all the kings horses and all the kings men
will never ever see the sun again
in this wasteland , its a no mans land"

well they saddled up their tanks
like a brave band of warriors
they rushed on the banks
and sank beneth the shore
they never saw the traps
and they fell through the floor

they say its all fair in love and land wars
the say it best to live and let live , but still settle up the score
reaching out for the golden ring
the executioner cried out and the choir did sing
they killed the hangman ,  and invented the guillotene
now noone can save us, from the horror we raised
and now the bitch is growling and the fires will rage
the blood lust in her eyes as she burns hem at the stake
will someone pinch me , so that i may wake
from this

" wasteland, this no mans land
yes its a wasteland, its a city of flames
this wasteland, its a cruel cruel fate
now all the kings horses and all the kings men
are riding in circles, but never find the end
of all this wasteland, and the queen wins again
the bones in her teeth are crushed to dust
the knight in shining armor is corroded with rust
noone can save us from this wasteland ,
this no mans land"

well the contracts are signed in triplicate and ink
sealing the deal the false prophet gives a wink
peace will reign , if the price is right
so grab a flaming sword or throw your dignity aside
cause theres no escape
the walls are now erected in this city of the damned
they murdered all the doctors , and washed their bloddy hands
concealing the truth, so the public wont mistake
they own the information, they can change it in a blink
keep the distractions flowing, keep the enemy at bay
send the good men off to fight another day
while they sit in their rocking chairs and count their demons wage

" in this wasteland , in this foreign place
this no mans land, where your better in the grave
this wasteland , we made a fatal mistake
paint the picture , and sacrifice your hand
it all will be censored , they will smite you where they stand
they will campaign and advertise cath em in their youth
keep the conspiracy going , so noone can know the truth
inside this wasteland , so sign away
to this wasteland, this paradise for hate
this wasteland, theres no escape"

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Perfect me

doctor please help can you fix me
im imperfect wanting to be someone ill never be
so i zero in
on every mark on my skin
feeling so sick
of how im not perfect
and contemplating not eating

" im a mess , im a mess
and i cant take the stress
im not proud of who i am
reaching out for help
but tell me where is the hand to pull me out
of my blackhole insanity
cut n paste masterpiece
make a cookie cutter star out of me
i am ready , your a plastic surgeon genius
well glue together the pieces
that wont fit
dying dying to be perfect"

i broke the mirrors, so i couldnt see
the horrible face looking back at me
the features are displaced
and they look disfigured to me
can you fix it , do you know the right techniques
can you fix can you perfect me?

my hands are shaking
i think there may be something wrong
losing my energy dont think i can go on
for much longer ,
can you make me stronger
can you make me beatiful
can you make me into a walking dream
can you perfect me

" im a mess , im a mess
and i cant take the stress
im not proud of who i am
reaching out for help
but tell me where is the hand to pull me out
of my blackhole insanity
cut n paste masterpiece
make a cookie cutter star out of me
i am ready , your a plastic surgeon genius
well glue together the pieces
that wont fit
dying dying to be perfect"

oh make me over
im defective
as far as i can see
the scalpels my new lover
its effective
make me a walking dream
can you perfect me

oh michael angelo
i am your new sculpture so
carve my face
chisel my body
ill pay anything if you can fix me

so wont you please
up the anesthesia
leave me with amnesia
wake me when im beautiful
make sure you keep me hott and youthful
make me believe
that you can fix me

" im a mess , im a mess
and i cant take the stress
im not proud of who i am
reaching out for help
but tell me where is the hand to pull me out
of my blackhole insanity
cut n paste masterpiece
make a cookie cutter star out of me
i am ready , your a plastic surgeon genius
well glue together the pieces
that wont fit
dying dying to be perfect"

take me to an early grave
bury me bury me , bury me
but make sure i look pretty
fix everything

theres nothing wrong with you
they say
whats going on with you
they say
what are we going to do
they say
im gonna fix you
i say to myself
shutting out everyone else,
i know im ugly
so doctor doctor can you fix me
i dont need psychiatry
just give me surgery

" im a mess , im a mess
and i cant take the stress
im not proud of who i am
reaching out for help
but tell me where is the hand to pull me out
of my blackhole insanity
cut n paste masterpiece
make a cookie cutter star out of me
i am ready , your a plastic surgeon genius
well glue together the pieces
that wont fit
dying dying to be perfect"

The death of innocence ( save your breath i cant be saved)

never turn away from what youve done
and clean up the messes that youve made
there are these things well never change
so what do we have for which to be ashamed

" save your breath i know,
im a lost cause, with no hope
and im only here until tomorrow
but tomorrow never comes
we cant escape what we have done
no matter how far we run
its our cross to bear
so pick it up, and let them stare
let them hoist you in the air
bury the nails into your skin
and hold your scream until the end
 all in all noone is really  innocent"

remember the cold november rain
it froze the make up to your face
and you could hide away your pain
and not show , but now the sun is back again
and all your scars are open , they are destined to remain
so just refuse to let it go
and crush your dreams with all my hope
let us take a final drink
then wash our sorrows down the sink
well never hide the things weve done
nor can we ever run far enough
we will not escape just leave us to our fate

" save your breath i know,
im a lost cause, with no hope
and im only here until tomorrow
but tomorrow never comes
we cant escape what we have done
no matter how far we run
its our cross to bear
so pick it up, and let them stare
let them hoist you in the air
bury the nails into your skin
and hold your scream until the end
 all in all noone is really  innocent"

i had a hard time just believing
but it was myself i was decieving
just trying to suffocate my anger
i never saw the danger
until the blood began to pour
and i slipped and fell down on the floor
and that how it always seems to begin
with me laying face down in my sins
i cannot bare to face
the horrors that i create
maybe thats why i cannot sleep
the guilt is buried deep inside of me

" save your breath i know,
im a lost cause, with no hope
and im only here until tomorrow
but tomorrow never comes
we cant escape what we have done
no matter how far we run
its our cross to bear
so pick it up, and let them stare
let them hoist you in the air
bury the nails into your skin
and hold your scream until the end
 all in all noone is really  innocent"

tuck the hair and hold my head
sheild my face from the vomit
the secrets of the living dead
i carry with me in my stead
i wake to screams i cant erase it
the things we did when we were wasted
i played the victim for so long
but im not the only one whos living wrong
but how hard can it be for someone fallen from grace
to turn a new leaf and learn how to change
maybe its not too late
but i still believe that i cannot be saved

" save your breath i know,
im a lost cause, with no hope
and im only here until tomorrow
but tomorrow never comes
we cant escape what we have done
no matter how far we run
its our cross to bear
so pick it up, and let them stare
let them hoist you in the air
bury the nails into your skin
and hold your scream until the end
 all in all noone is really  innocent"

none of us is innocent
the sad truth is tere may be nothing out there
not for me at least, we gave away our humanity
and transformed ourselves into beasts
let us never rest in peace
and walk the world in fear
your prophecy doesnt haunt me
because i just cant bring myself to care

" save your breath i know,
im a lost cause, with no hope
and im only here until tomorrow
but tomorrow never comes
we cant escape what we have done
no matter how far we run
its our cross to bear
so pick it up, and let them stare
let them hoist you in the air
bury the nails into your skin
and hold your scream until the end
 all in all noone is really  innocent"

Your awfully overdressed for this side of town


rise and shine butterfly
walk into the light
and show that your beauty fades
to all of us who can see
just like the person you pretend to be
in sleezy downtown places
where they pay you by the hour
just to spit in their faces

" oh isnt it a tragedy
thought were some kind of celebrity
oh oh oh and did you hate it
when he said to you
you only look good when im enebriated"

so cinderella you broke your glass slipper
and got caught pulling down the zipper
of the newest clientel
you run the block , and they all buy what youve got to sell
but they dont love you ,
they play you like a fiddle
saying hey diddle diddle , got your cat nip right here
and dont the words seem to seer
your already torn sense of self esteem
but can you see how bright the makeup makes you gleam
its just a mask to you
and what they ask of you
leaves you ready to sell it all for a piece of that mean green

"isnt a tragedy
thought you were a celebrity
well honey , your only good for five minutes at a time
they know they can get away
cause you accept their nickels and their dimes
oh but darling feeling sorry isnt a crime
and i know that your down and out
and i know you know all about
the hands that will pull you out
but you think your beautiful
yeah your a teenage dreem
but honey wake up and realize
your only just a street corner queen
and did the words sting
and di you hate it
when he told you, your not so hot
when hes not enebriated"

snow white yeah you put up a good fight
you drove all the dwarves plum crazy
and no you didnt care
that they were drunk their visions hazy
workin night and dawn
but you are just a pawn
working for the forest pimp
istn it just a little shady

oh baby the apple wasnt what  put you to sleep
and baby i know so well, your not in danger your just waiting
but prince charming isnt gonna come , well you were only dreaming
you could have had it all
but you choose to fall
into the lifestyle
of all the other gals
that own the night
and your only good for five minutes at a time

" isnt it a tragedy
when you had everything
oh baby stick your leg out just  a little farther
try to haggle just a little harder
dont get in the car for less than you can pay the bills on time
and is it just a shame
somebody bless her heart
well she choose , living in the dark
and did it hurt you bad
wen he turned you down
sighting im just not intrested, and baby what your selling
im not in the mood for buying
well keep trying now
what he said to you ,  did you hate it
your not hot, cause im not enebriated"

well all the good girls go , to heaven
but where will you go, when noones buyin
they keep turning you down, but you keep sellin
out, on the street, with those heels on your feet
and do they make you seem
higher than the drugs your taking
give it up and just quit faking
get your stop watch out , they got five minutes
well i hope to god that they can finish
theyre running out of dimes
and your only good for fiv minutes at a time
what a crime what i crime , i cant believe i said it

" aint it a tragedy
they think your so boring
so you hide behind your make up and your heels
well your feet are hurting, can barely hold the steering wheel
while you ride while you ride
and now theyre out of money, and your out of time
well it was the worst goodbye
and tell me did you hate him for it
he said , your not hot when im not enebriated"

heart attack in high heels
with heart that doesnt feel
anything but a rush from cocain
and youve spiraled way too far down
and your awfully overdressed for this side of town

self destructive romance

 the sun will shine again, i suppose
when you finally pick up your things and go
its been silent for weeks
an unpleasant break, form being sid and nancy
the screaming reminds me im still alive
the shotguns blasts i can survive
but the deafaning silence
its breaking apart my unstable mind

the important thing to remember
is that your going to get through
its always darkest before the day
but the night is dragging and
when am i going to hear from you
just let me go, i have to know
let me hear those words im longing to let you spew
i know your angry but i am too
and you wont speak , your driving me crazy
how are we supposed to get through

" revelations i have none
that survive in the light
of truth and fruition
i cannot escape this hate
the rage i feel, is gripping the steering wheel
and driving me into a wall
the fires are growing
slip down and crawl
like the sun is going to fall"

i dont want us to be okay
dont try to disguise the facts
hang your self with you false appologies
and goodbyes
they will never heal the pain inside
and i want to suffer like i should
it sounds so psychotic but it will do me some good
in the end, this way the rage and the hate wil subside

" revelations i have none
that survive in the light
of truth and fruition
i cannot escape this hate
the rage i feel, is gripping the steering wheel
and driving me into a wall
the fires are growing
slip down and crawl
like the sun is going to fall"

its the hurt thats burning inside
you keep me going, on false hope
and my faith in you is running low
where is god to settle this fight
beating my brain, with the rage taking over inside
its like a cage
that burys me down , so i can sufocate, and die
never tell me its going to be alright
i dont want to hear anything but your exiting for the last time

" revelations i have none
that survive in the light
of truth and fruition
i cannot escape this hate
the rage i feel, is gripping the steering wheel
and driving me into a wall
the fires are growing
slip down and crawl
like the sun is going to fall"

can you destroy this , heart thats so full of pride
find somewhere you can run and hide
i wont try to find you
i dont care anymore shut the door
dont even bither to say goodnight
save your breath i dont want to hear it
nothing you say will ever heal this
and id just as soon swallow cyanide

" revelations i have none
that survive in the light
of truth and fruition
i cannot escape this hate
the rage i feel, is gripping the steering wheel
and driving me into a wall
the fires are growing
slip down and crawl
like the sun is going to fall"

 the sun will shine again i suppose
and i dont care where you go
when you leave i will not break
and i wont hesitate

to seize what is mine
its what you pay for the time
that you forced me to waste
i cant look after you
and i wont be there for you
your like a leech clinging to my side
well i dont love you just let go
you hurt me to many times , and the scars will always show

the sun is gonna fall
and end it all
your gonna pay for the things youve done
the words you never said
the battles we fought , neither of us could have won
imovable objects, unstoppable forces
collide and explode
destroy the past , so that noone will know
damaged goods , hold no value
and the bruises prevent me from having hope
i should have never met you
i should have taken the chance to let go
and now were all lost , in the endless snow

Monday, January 17, 2011

Duality


pull your head away from the flames
foolish child you shouldnt play adult games
your not ready to grow up and change
you never learned what it means to be ashamed

its in their nature to lie and deceive
what you call pretend , we call a disease
theyre training you to carry the weight of their sins
by the time you start walking you'll be knocked to your shins
on the floor you'll crawl
youll never know who you are
because they steal identities
still slpping your hand when you shout out obsceneties
its not allright to be individual
it inspire the fear that tears apart the capital

" duality we walk this fine line
duality will extinguish your light
break all of your vows
bend down and bow
accepting your fate wait and see
your gonna be crushed by duality"



yeah theyre gonna crucify you
burn you at the stake , no mere torture will do
cause your a devil to them
wearing designer skin
who you are inside , is not what you should show
keep your poker face on , blend in with the snow
hide your personality and go on with the show

" duality we walk this fine line
duality will extinguish your light
break all of your vows
bend down and bow
accepting your fate wait and see
your gonna be crushed by duality"

because your out of your mind
you walk the line
your heartbeat ticking out of time ,
you lead a life of crime
theyre looking for you ,
stay out of the searchlight
and when your found out give up the fight
theyre gonna fry you
they know your not who
you pretend to be in mixed company

" duality we walk this fine line
duality will extinguish your light
break all of your vows
bend down and bow
accepting your fate wait and see
your gonna be crushed by duality"

the sparks will fly before the storm will calm
so bury the persona in your unclean palms
and carry on as a noone
in the middle of nowhere
Sing into the bottle as you throw away all of your cares
but dont give in youve got to be the one who dares
stand out and yell catch me if you can

" duality we walk this fine line
duality will extinguish your light
break all of your vows
bend down and bow
accepting your fate wait and see
your gonna be crushed by duality"

your never gonna run away in fear
hold your fist high , and show the world that your sincere
your not afraid, no your not afraid
show them all your colors and bare with pride the cross you made
carry it through the desert , and show them nothings changed
your a martyr and theyll disect your abstract brain
when they pull you down , dont you fret
or show regret
dont let your face show any pain

" Duality, we show no empathy
for the heros that we break
Duality, boy as long as you breath
dont you know that they will never let you be
when they pull you down , know your gonna die
but dont you cry
because of your sacrifice , and all your audacity
the world is gonna change, and be rocked by your wake"

The boy who destroyed the world


 so you say your alive
but youve got a heartbeat like the sound of signs
deaf ears fall on the pulse
of the boys whos got a soul balcker than the night
he was buried breathing, but came back something sinister
he drowned the world in fire, while his heart tissue blistered
he smiles with gratitude for the creature who dug him up
hes got an attitude, setting his sights on vengance they know hes nuts
they could not lock him up
the chains will never hold a walking dream
more like a nghtmare, with eyes like the sea

" crush out the blackness
and tear apart the sun
dress the world in apathy
lie and deny the terror that youve done
they will believe, anything you tell them
they will not question the information you sell them
watch them suffer as the crumple up and curl
his heart is full of posion and he wants to destroy the world"

the pupils dialate
as his hate grows
nothing is a mistake
he calculates the right dose
keeping you sick but not deceased
when you pass out you choke
your useless serving your purpose
when your done with your task its time for you to go

" crush out the blackness
and tear apart the sun
dress the world in apathy
lie and deny the terror that youve done
they will believe, anything you tell them
they will not question the information you sell them
watch them suffer as the crumple up and curl
his heart is full of posion and he wants to destroy the world"

so he simmers in his ambition
they cut him off so he'll filet them alive
they put him in the dark
so its only fair that he should extinguish the light
this heart of darkness is heavy and cold
kerosene and vodka in his veins
and hes ready to explode
drop the bombs let the firestorm blow up
the flames grow high and mortality goes up

" crush out the blackness
and tear apart the sun
dress the world in apathy
lie and deny the terror that youve done
they will believe, anything you tell them
they will not question the information you sell them
watch them suffer as the crumple up and curl
his heart is full of posion and he wants to destroy the world"

the hardest part is carrying the cross
no matter how he tries
he cannot throw his conscience off
he runs away from the pain
every venomous word from his dry mouth
is dripping with disdain
and its been said that hes a snake
he preffers to think of himself
as a counterculture saint
with a shotgun in his hand
he turns the innocent bystanders
into a brand new coat of paint
theyre all guilty
as far as he can see
so why should he feel ashamed

" crush out the blackness
and tear apart the sun
dress the world in apathy
lie and deny the terror that youve done
they will believe, anything you tell them
they will not question the information you sell them
watch them suffer as the crumple up and curl
his heart is full of posion and he wants to destroy the world"

sing a song of sorrow
as they bring him down in flames
he opened fire, and changed his name
forever remembered as a devil in a cape
they buried him in concrete so his soul could not escape
he walks in a world of darkness selling extracts of his rage
the padlock is open , and he broke apart the chains
it just goes to show a tainted soul knows no restrain
so lock up the guns and try to stay out of the way
because hes a lion and hes hungry
stand clear of his rampage
a shooting gallery
hes an executionary artist
like a bulletproof monet

" crush out the blackness
and tear apart the sun
dress the world in apathy
lie and deny the terror that youve done
they will believe, anything you tell them
they will not question the information you sell them
watch them suffer as the crumple up and curl
his heart is full of posion and he wants to destroy the world"

Friday, January 14, 2011

Hold On

i took all the pictures off of the wall
because i couldnt stand the eyes as they stared back at me
in their silence i know they recall
all the things that i keep bottled up all of my memories

searching my soul
i found some things
that i shall never repeat
loking back at my younger self
i cannot believe

how could i have been that person
how could ihave been so hateful and so mean
i guess you could call it an awkward phase
i spent six years of my life stuck in between

the spaces that are left
they are seemingly empty
they once were filled with all my regrets
i let it all go so simply

i wish i had kown how to let go all those years before

i wasted my time with bad company
i did a few things without any thinking
its hard to believe that i ever was that person
but i guess that it all has a meaning
in the end you could say it made me, me

who i am today
is not what i used to be
so jealous and spiteful
its all now a memory
preserved in the eyes
of a photograph of a teen
thats lost in his own shadows
and feeling so empty

" Hold On
dont ever let life go
dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
if you would change your mind "

i walked down from the balcony
i couldnt find a reason to stay
or a reason to leave
i left all my hate bottled up inside
it was so intoxicating that i couldnt see

the things i destroyed
with harsh words of anger
the holes in my heart
were hidden and deep
in my youth

i saw things that one should never see
and words i had said left them in disbelief
noone would ever understand
and i didnt trust anyone to take my hand

" Hold On
dont ever let life go
dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
if you would change your mind "

the words of adults
resonated in my resentful ears
i never wanted to hear
what they had to say
they didnt know me anyway

just because i was in trouble all the time
didnt mean i was bad, i was still good
i swear i was just misunderstood
the washed their hands of me
threw in the towel and walked away clean

i tried to open their eyes
but they were blind they would never see
the hell i was in everyday
i cant believe i was ever strong enough to chase it away

" Hold On
dont ever let life go
dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
if you would change your mind "

Hold ON
to what you have in front of you
tomorrow may bring new things
or they may take what you have
its like playing the lottery

its all about persistance
and sticking with the hand your dealt
youll make it a winner
though its hard to see
give it another turn
dont light that match and let it all burn
as it destroys everything

" Hold On
dont ever let life go
dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
if you would change your mind "

your not too old
to change your mind
you can learn how to live
in the hell that your in
and make it all into something
just hold on
soon your days of wanting more will be done
you can have everything
you just got to keep believing
dont let it all go
hold on weve got one more show
hold on
hold on

all is not lost
it can all be saved
and if it doesnt come back to you
it never meant a thing

just because the door has been closed
doesnt mean theres no way out
put your decidions on hold
and find a way around
hold on, HOLD ON

" Hold On
dont ever let life go
dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
if you would change your mind "

Hold on
dont ever let your life go
open your eyes look past the bad see the things that are beautiful
Dont pull the trigger
i promise it gets better
all you have to do is find
one reason and jst change your mind

life gets better as you go on
dont ever give it up
just clench your fist and hold on
the answer wont always be no
so never let go

one day your gonna reach the sun
fly off into infinity and beyond
dont give up now just beleive when i say it gets better some how
keep going, dont say your life is done
and Hold on
things will be allright
so hold on tight , hold on

Into Eternity

 the hard part is breathing,
 my eyes have been open for so long that they are bleeding,
 but if you stay and hold my hand my heart wont stop beating

i dont think
i can only feel
the pain is just so deep
that its numbing

my lungs are filling fast
i feel them collapse within my chest
from the strain it takes to inhale
ad with every last breath i grow more pale
and i cant keep going on

each step is a miracle
as i stagger to the safety zone
before the angelscome to take me home
i cry out i dont want to leave

the sun is rising up
the light burns my skin
as if the pain werent enough
i dont know if i could survive this time

wont someone hold me tight
and say it will be just fine
everythings gonna turn out alright
could you give me life
as i struggle and i fight
to hold on to this one

the death of seasons
the rebirthing of the soul
all in all the reasons
are something ill never know

i should not have tried
to save anothers life
i never knew how wrong i was
but i thought i was invincible

the lines are blurring now
as all heads are bowed
they know i cant be saved
then i looked in your eyes
you kept a straight face and lied
you said it would be alright

the blood is pouring out
the words escape my mouth
i curse my words from all the pain
i cant understand
why i could not withstand
all the bullets flew right by me

and suddenly i recall
as my heart rate falls
the last thing i can work out
your hands grows cold as you let your secret out
betrayed
and stained by the blood on the hands with which you laid
my cold and empty shell
my body in the ground

i reach into the sky
to bring you to my side
i whisper in your ear
the words so cold and insincere
that i forgive your sin
we can start over again
and you blood starts curdling
the pain is setting in
and we will be together for an eternity

i wont go down alone
will not die on my own
did noone ever tell you ,that youd reap what you have sewn

the hardest part is breathing
your eyes are dry and bleeding
but i will stay and hold your hand as our hearts stop beating